It has been a week and a half since I last blogged. The reason is because I was scared.
Last week I started my new job, and on my second day I was sick. I told everyone at work I had bad Chinese, but I knew it was because I had a panic attack half way through the night before. I am noticing that they are taking me longer and longer to recover from. I wasn’t ‘well’ again until Friday.
I ended up being sent home early on Tuesday, I made it the whole day with a mix of diazepam and buscopam on the Wednesday, and I stayed home on the Thursday. Not a good showing for my first week.
I wanted to blog over the weekend, but I just wasn’t feeling up to it. Just the thought of it started my heart racing and not in a good way. So I held off. I tried again on Tuesday, but was still a bit iffy. So here we are Friday night, and I feel perfect writing this post. Not even a twinge.
So, on that note, my second week of work has been going much better! I am really loving my job. It is so much more than I thought it was going to be. I get to use a wide range of my skills, UX Design, BA, QA, Project Management. I can really see myself making a real difference, making systems for employees and customers, that will actually be used, rather than tools that are left to fall off the edge of the world.
I am also knee deep in internal politics now. Turns out, the manager of the IT department is also the son of the general manager. He also has zero qualification, except for the fact that he has done the IT for the business since he was 12. This I am finding it hard to deal with. He is a really nice guy, but I am just finding that he doesn’t really appear to know what he is doing. Oh, on the face of it, he seems to be all over everything, but as soo and you start asking deeper questions about a hundred thousand dollar project he wants to start, he just can’t answer the questions without getting defensive.
My manager is a perfectionist and would run the whole. Business if she could (she’s the marketing senior), and if she thinks your idea or approach is stupid or bad, then it will not be given the go ahead. She loves to be in control.
But overall it is a good place. They have some really grand plans coming up in the next few months and I am super excited to be a part of them. I am in love with my job, and it has been a very long time since I felt like this. So happy that I am back on my a-game.
I am baby sitting my niece tomorrow, as my sister-in-law is struggling a little. Not sure how that will go, as she and her don’t get along very well, but she is family and I am not very good at sitting on my hands while a loved one struggles. But hopefully the bubs will be super cute and give me inspiration for tomorrow’s post!
Always & Forever
Mrs T xx